Image by ydhsu

When I took my lovely little baby for his three month check up at the Maternal and Child Health Nurse recently, something very special happened.

Before leaving the centre I walked over and read a newspaper article on the notice board. Another mother then came up and introduced herself to me. I had never met her before, but she had recognised me from seeing me a supermarket at the start of this year. She says that she remembered seeing me very pregnant with my four children and thought how calm I seemed and how well behaved the children were. She was standing in queue in another aisle with her own child and hoped that she would get a chance to tell me this. We moved on before she was served, so she didn’t get the chance.

This lovely woman said she was so happy to see me again, so she could tell me what a great job she thought I was doing and how nice it was to see a family happy together like we were.

My reason for writing this, is not for me to sprout how wonderful I am, but to say thank you to this woman for taking the time to give me such warm and generous feedback. It made me feel very proud of myself and my family. She did not have to do this, but went out of her way to let me know these thoughts.

With Mother’s Day being celebrated this Sunday in Australia, it made me think again of the kindness of this woman and how great it felt to have my work as a mother acknowledged. It is great to have a day to take time out and appreciate mums, but to me this simple act of honesty and communication did amazing things for my confidence and has stuck with me.

So I intend to celebrate Mother’s work all year round by taking the lead from the mother I met. When I see a mother working beautifully with her family, I will acknowledge it and let her know. I also encourage you to do the same. And Happy Mother’s Day!

Technorati Tags: mother's day, parenting

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“The Rise Of The Dummy Mummies” - this was the title of an article in the Sunday Life Magazine from The Sunday Age on April 19, 2009. With a title like that I had to check it out. A quick Google search found that this was actually an extract from an original article published by the UK Guardian under the following title and by line:

The dummy mummy decade
Boring, selfish, smug: How a generation of women became obsessed with motherhood

While I appreciate diversity and respect the right of women to choose to have children or not, I found this article by Rachel Cooke quite offensive. I will quote a few sentences that I had most trouble with:

Once upon a time, educated women fought to separate their identities from the ideal of mother, knowing that until the two came to be seen as wholly distinct they would never be taken seriously; and, in any case, who wants to be defined by only one aspect of their life?

Nor am I going to list the ways that childless women sometimes carry an extra burden of work in the office compared to their colleagues who are mothers because my own strongly-felt feminism means that I will always believe in maternity rights, flexible working and all the rest of it, even though I am unlikely ever to benefit from these things (pious, eh? - and get this: I used to be a school governor, too).

No, all I want to say here, really, is that all this droning on about baby and toddler world is not, in the long run, doing any of us any good. For me, and many other women, it’s boring and selfish, and it implicitly casts judgment on the way we choose to live our lives. For men, it just confirms what many of them secretly think, which is that women, bottom line, are only really interested in one thing, and that is making babies, and why should they be promoted or taken seriously or paid well?

Rachel Cooke’s main issue is with women who she believes can only talk about their children. Is there not people who all they can talk about is their work or their sport etc? Any conversation that is dominated by the interest of one person is not going to be an enjoyable conversation for both parties.

At a party or function is it not commonplace to ask of an acquaintance “How’s work?” Does not the “work” of a mother involve her children?

I find it disappointing the way that women can attack each other in the media like this. There is still a distance to be traveled before women can achieve equality in all areas. What is needed is appreciation of the right for women to choose the lifestyle they wish to lead, and appreciation of the diversity that will come from this choice.

I did however ask myself the question “Am I being too sensitive about this?”. As I am a stay at home mum, who blogs about kids, has this just touched a raw nerve? I don’t think so.

What do you think? Is this article offensive or does it have a point?

Technorati Tags: parenting

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I find it hard to believe that my little baby is already four weeks old! I would like to thank everyone for their lovely comments and emails that I received upon the arrival of our gorgeous son.

In my offline world I have been so lucky to have had such a supportive and generous network of friends and an amazing school community.

This Tuesday the above was what I had dropped to my home by my eldest son’s classroom co-ordinator. It is what we call a baby bundle. Families contribute food to help families with new babies. On top of what is in the photo, I had another few meals dropped in later that day by mums who had also freshly made the meals for us.

It was touching to receive a gift that was so practical, delicious and so very generous. And this was not the first meals that had been dropped into our house. Only a couple of days out of hospital and a good friend dropped in a lovely meal for the freezer. A neighbour bought us the most delicious pie and our baby boy had been showered with the most beautiful gifts.

Another friend brought this basket of goodies below in the first fortnight.

And I have had amazing help from a dear neighbour who brought my children home from school in the first weeks and helped with getting Little Rascal to his cricket commitments, another great friend who helped Thinker get to his cricket commitments and I have had so many generous offers of help.

I am glad to be part of such a wonderful community that so willingly supports others. I will always remember the assistance and generosity that I have received and look forward to the time when I can do the same for others. Thank you all very much, your efforts have been truly appreciated by the whole family!
____________________________________________________________________

I haven’t been on line very much over the last four weeks and haven’t been as active with responding to comments on the blog, nor getting around to commenting on other blogs. Thanks to Google Reader, I have still been able to keep with my favourite blogs, even if I haven’t been able to comment. It will still a while before I increase my on line presence, so please forgive my absence as I spend time with our new little man.

Technorati Tags: baby, birth, thank you

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You may not have noticed my absence for the last few days, due to the magic of scheduled posts, but last Thursday, 22nd January our beautiful son arrived at 9.11am. Complete with a thick head of curly hair, he weighed 4.16kg (9 pound 2) and was 54cm long. We arrived home today and he is bringing great joy to us all.

I have further scheduled posts for this week and will be online only in a limited capacity, as the older children prepare to start back at school at the end of the week. Apologies for a delay in responding to email/comments, I will make my way through them eventually!

Technorati Tags: baby, birth

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There is not the usual 10 things post today. Yesterday, whilst driving the family Tarago I had someone do you a u-turn right in front of me. I applied hard on the brakes but just could not stop in time.

Luckily and thankfully, myself, our unborn child, the two children I had in the car and the driver of the other car were all perfectly okay.

Our car though is not okay and had to be towed away. We are now trying to organise a replacement vehicle to get us to Mildura for Christmas. Did you know that this is the peak time for hiring Taragos??

Anyway, although feeling completely fine and the baby is still moving beautifully in utero, the whole thing gave me quite a shock. I am going to take a few days away from the computer, to relax, appreciate how lucky we were and get some more rest.

I will be back on the week end. Hope you are all enjoying the festive season and are keeping safe.

Nicole

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I am a member (and moderator) and the great Aussie Blogger’s Forum. It is a very friendly and helpful place, which I would encourage you to visit if you haven’t already done so.

This Christmas is the first for Aussie Blogger’s Forum and they had a secret santa (Kris Kringle) which I participated in. I was delighted to receive in the mail yesterday a very cute and funny book, as photographed (quite poorly by me!) above.

The book is called You’re a Fabulous Mum*. By Susannah Mac

* Despite the stale bread, unmade beds and guilty thoughts in your head.

It should be a great read, I have skimmed a few parts and it has already made me laugh. This one in particular was amusing, given that my oldest son asked me when I was going out on the weekend, if dad was babysitting them:

It is OK…………
to advise your partner that he can’t call it babysitting if they are his own children.

Thank you to my Secret Santa for my lovely gift.

Technorati Tags: aussie bloggers, secret santa

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The ever resourceful Problogger tweeted about this project going on in the blogosphere earlier today. It is being run at Chuck Westbrook’s Blog and is aimed at solving the problem of Blogs With Great Content and No Readers.

In brief participants like myself will:
1. Join the group for the project.
2. Read a good, lesser known blog for two weeks.
3. At the end of the two weeks, the group moves to another blog to read.

I have never joined in on anything like this before, but I think it will be a great way to expose myself to some fantastic little gems of blogs out there, and maybe even bring this blog some new readers.

Head to Chuck’s blog if you would like to join in too.

Technorati Tags: blogs

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We have a beautiful border collie dog named Millie. Millie is now a much quieter dog than she used to be as she has passed her 13th year. She has always been brilliant with the children and other than her slight tendency to bark at things in the sky, she is also a very well behaved, outside only dog. We now have some recent animal additions to the house, that I would like to introduce to you:

Hermit Crabs

Below are “Active” and “Sleepy”. They are Hermit Crabs and are the loved pet of Little Rascal. We have had Hermit Crabs as children’s pets before in our house, with not a lot of success. Little Rascal first received the tank complete with heat pad and two crabs for a birthday present (all my sisters put in togehter). As the Hermit Crabs come from Queensland, they really didn’t enjoy Melbourne’s cold autumn (he received them in April last year).

After we lost the first Hermit Crab to the cold, we moved them into a warmer area of the house, but it wasn’t long before the colder mornings took their toll. We did get more Hermit Crabs but they didn’t last too long either.

So now we are trying in spring to see if the Hermit Crabs can cope better in Melbourne’s warmer weather!

Axolotl

The other new addition is the still to be named axolotl (Mexican Walking Fish). Thinker had seen a documentary on the axolotl and decided that he would save his pocket money and buy one. Thinker already had the tank and filter etc (another group birthday present from my sisters!), so he only actually had to purchase the Mexican walking fish.

Thinker didn’t even have to buy food. Axolotl’s eat worms and our compost is teaming with worms, so he simply goes to the compost, then rinses the worm and drops it in the tank. For a creature that doesn’t move around a much and has poor eye sight, it can move very quick to devour its lunch!

Responsibilities Of Pet Ownership

Before making these purchases, we had serious discussions with both children on the responsibilities that come with pet ownership. With a human addition to come to the house soon, the last thing that I want is more cleaning and feeding!

So both boys accepted that to have these animals as pets, that they would be fully responsible for the feeding and cleaning that is associated with the pet. I have to admit to having my doubts as to whether they would indeed do this, but to date they have both been very keen to take care of their new pets.

We are only a week into having them in the house, so we still have some time to go, but so far the new additions have been successful. The smaller two children will spend large chunks of time just watching the Hermit Crabs and the axolotl and all children love watching feeding time of the axolotl.

Technorati Tags: axolotl, children's pets, hermit crabs, mexican walking fish

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Kin tagged me to do this fun questionairre.

Attached or single? I have been married for 11 years.

Best Friend? I am lucky enough to have more than one!

Cake or Pie? Cake, preferably chocolate.

Day of Choice? Friday. Signals the start of the weekend. This is probably also a hang over from corporate days, when we would finish work early and head to the bar.

Essential Item? MacBook!

Flavour of icecream? Honey Comb

Gummy Bears or Worms? Neither - don’t really like these types of lollies

Hometown? Mildura

Indulgences? Chocolate and music.

January or July? January. I love warm weather and it is school holidays.

Kids? Currently 4, but soon to be 5.

Last Movie I saw in a Theatre? Not Quite Hollywood (doco on Ozploitation films).

Middle Name? Maree

Number of Siblings? 3 beautiful sisters.

Oranges or Apples? Apples. - pink ladies to be precise.

Phobia or Fear? Crows. Think I watched Alfred Hitchcock’s Birds when I was too young.

Quote? “I think there’s just one kind of folks. Folks.” Jean Louise (Scout) Finch. To Kill A Mockingbird. Harper Lee.

Reason to Smile? My family.

Season? Definitely summer. I should probably live where Kin does - it sounds wonderful.

Tag five more…. Kate, ickle kids, Hoppo Bumpo, Veronica and Jane.

Unknown fact about me? As a child I was incredibly forgetful and disorganised.

Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals? Oppressor of animals, sorry.

Xrays or Ultrasound? Ultrasound. Even fifth time around I am amazed at how emotional I get seeing the new baby for the first time.

Your favourite food? Home made gnocchi.

Zodiac? Taurus

Technorati Tags: meme

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Just a quick note to let you know that I have a post up at Aussie Bloggers - Managing Blog Subscriptions. Not one child related word written there, but advice on how to manage 100s of blog subscriptions!

Technorati Tags: aussie bloggers, google reader

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