This year as I mentioned each month my goal has been to be a planned, patient and present mother to our five beautiful kids. I will detail more how I feel I have succeeded with this goal in a few weeks, but today I wanted to share the feedback from our kids on how they think I have gone.
It is fine for me to write each month on how I am progressing, but I need to know what the key stakeholders (my kids) think. I strategically waited until after I had read and discussed their end of year reports with them. I explained that their feedback was my end of year report and they should tell me honestly how they feel, letting them know I can only improve if I know what isn’t working.
I think this approach made them feel comfortable about giving me honest feedback. A couple of the more sensitive ones, found it hard to say what I should improve, so I shared what some of the other kids said and how I was happy to hear their thoughts and this helped them have the confidence to tell me what they really wanted me to work on.
I kept the feedback session simple and broke it into two parts. I would have loved more detailed responses, because I think they could teach me quite a bit more about becoming a better parent, but every bit helps!
My goal for 2015 was to be a planned, patient and present mother to you. How do you think I went?
Master 17: I think you have tried more and you have become better at being more patient. Not sure about spending more time with us. With the planned thing you are always prepared when we go out and have snacks and stuff.
Master 14: A bit more planned than last year and much more present compared to last year. Patience is about the same.
Miss 12: Better than last year. Have been calmer and have played more. I have enjoyed doing more 20 minute blocks.
Master 9: You aren’t as patient when you are busy.
Master 6: I liked doing our seven days of game playing. You are sometimes too cranky when you are tired.
Areas for improvement/future learning?
Master 17: You can get agitated too easily. Everything isn’t a big deal.
Master 14: Need to give clearer instructions.
Miss 12: I don’t like it when you call out from one room when I am in another room.
Master 9: Only give one order at a time.
Master 6: Play with me more.
The kids have provided me with such fantastic feedback. I agree with everything they say. It would be easy me to make excuses or justify my behaviour, but that isn’t going to achieve anything nor is it respectful to the kids who have shared honestly.
I will use this information to help craft my goal for 2016 and am optimistic with their ongoing feedback I will continue to become better at this parenting gig.
Have you asked your kids for feedback before?
PS. Later this week I will be seeking your feedback as well! The only way to improve is listen to the thoughts and opinions of those who matter so I look forward to reading what you have to say too