On Dying, Living and The Passing Of Time

In the space of two weeks recently, myself and my husband both had an uncle die. My husband’s uncle had cancer and had outlived the doctor’s prognosis, but the cancer eventually took his life. My uncle had a sudden and massive stroke, completely unexpected.

While very different, these men had some similar characteristics:

  • Spoke the truth
  • Worked hard
  • Loved their families
  • Were highly respected

Both of them lived in different parts of country Victoria so the drives to attend the funerals gave me plenty of time to contemplate dying and living.

It made me think about what my legacy will be. It made me ask myself if I am spending time where I really want to. It made me ask myself if I am putting enough into the relationships around me. With this backdrop, the collection of links to read this month are focused on dying, living and time.

Rest in peace Gary and Ian. To your families, our thoughts and prayers are still with you.

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Build a Regret-Free Life

This is an interview on Mindful with Bronnie Ware, who is the author of The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. Ware shares what she learned while working in palliative care. You can also read more about it here too.
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It’s Not About “Productivity.” It’s About Living Purposefully

I write and talk about productivity quite a bit, but I do agree with this post from 99U. You can be productive and yet not be living a fulfilling life.

It becomes less about tips and tricks and more about making sure you’re allocating the most scarce resource in the universe, your attention, in ways that most closely align with who you are and what impact you want to have on the world.

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Do You Suffer from #FOMO?

A more light hearted article but addressing a very real phenomena – FOMO or Fear Of Missing Out. I am a recovering sufferer of FOMO, with a tendency to fall off the wagon, so it was good to read this article from GQ’s senior style editor:

#FOMO is an unwinnable game. Even for the people in the very pictures that are eliciting our jealousy. All those Instagram hotshots who are always doing the most exciting, most enviable, most fashionable and champagne-y stuff? They are, according to our statistical analyses here at the Center, the very individuals with the most hyperactive #FOMO. Do you know, new friends, how much work it takes to be one of those people who is at the right place at the right time, all the time? An awful lot of exertion—blood, sweat, tears, texts, e-mails, tweets, Facebook lurks, and most of all, fear—goes into making the social arts look effortless. It’s that fear that makes them work so hard.

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Taking time to task

Many people’s experience, as it relates to time, is that they feel caught in the jet stream of a fast-paced, multi-tasking, do more-achieve more work style. The problem is in the approach. It’s not about doing more or getting more done. It’s about enjoying what you are doing.

This post doesn’t just state the problem, but has 12 questions to ask yourself to examine how you spend your time and work out where you really want to be spending it.
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Make More Time by Dropping Tasks

Andrea Dekker makes a fantastic case as to why when we are feeling over worked, we need to consider dropping tasks as an option. This sounded familiar to me and I am sure it will to many readers as well:

We feel like we HAVE to say yes to housework because company is coming over.

We feel like we HAVE to say yes to another committee or volunteer opportunity.

We feel like we HAVE to say yes to more hours or another project at work.

We feel like we HAVE to say yes to making fancy treats for our kids’ school because the other moms do to.

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How are you spending your time?