10 Posts That Made Me Think About Motherhood, About Me and My Work

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Image by piermario

An eclectic collection of posts this month. All of them have given me things to think about and some have given me ideas for actions to take.

1. Work and Family Juggle

In this post on the Wall Street Journal – Life as a Working Mom of Four, it is interesting to read how one family juggles work and family:

While keeping up with four is a lot of work, the main reason things work well in our family is my husband. He’s a stay-at-home dad now and the most frugal man alive.

So often in the discussion of working mums, there is not much mention of the role dad plays.

2. Not Enough Time

Since reading this incredibly succinct post from Seth Godin (5 words!) – You don’t need more time, I have been thinking much more about what it is I want to achieve in the next couple of months.

3. Not Giving Up

I love this post from Kelly- Keeping your dreams alive, which she has written at Kleenex Mums.

I became a mother and gave my all. Then one day, I woke up and didn’t know who I was anymore. I had given up my dreams because they seemed unattainable.

Kelly then writes ways in which you can keep your dreams alive in a sustainable way.

4. Do I Have A Style?

Nikki from Styling you posted this late last year – The Styling You 2011 Style Mantra. Along with some other posts I have seen recently, it has got me thinking – Do I have a style? Do I need a style? How do I get a style if I don’t have one? This is a work in progress for me. Do you have a style?

5. The Gifts of Imperfection

There is much to think about in this post from Bernice – Letting go of who I thought I was supposed to be. She shares her learnings from reading the book The Gifts of Imperfection:

In reading, I discovered that I derived my self-worth from always having the answers and offering advice. (kinda funny when you think about what I am doing now!) In my previous job(s) I was to go-to person, I had the answers, the solutions, and being able to give that, even at the expense of myself, made me feel worthy. On the flipside, I didn’t need help. I didn’t ask for help. I was strong and could do it on my own.

6. Being Happy With Your Choices

While this post specifically talks about one area of choice – Resolved: To Be Happy with How We Do School, I think the philosophy carries through out all of parenting:

In our quest to navigate this minefield we call motherhood, it can be all too easy to feel attacked, no matter what choices we’ve made. It is a judgmental world, and there are always those who will find fault with the decisions you make for your family. Unfortunately, we cannot change all the world’s perception, but we CAN resolve to be happy with our own choices when it comes to how we do school.

7. I need to be…….

Carrie from The Parenting Passageway always has very calming advice, just like in this post – When Your Children Are At Their Worst…. Carrie spins the situation around to us as parents, as opposed to concentrating on the kid’s behaviour.

You need to be at your best.

You need to set the tone. Quietly.

You need to calm down.

8. Do What You Love

In this new to me blog, I could really relate to this post – accomplish everything. There are great tips in this post on how to accomplish your goals, but he is pretty clear about accomplishing everything:

Don’t accomplish everything; just do what counts.

Spend as much of your time as possible doing work you love.

Work smarter and harder.

9. Having It All

I thoroughly enjoy Sarah Wilson’s blog. This recent post – why having a good career leaves women single: explained with a study made me think, how lucky I am not to be single! Wilson quotes this piece of research in her post:

The cold-hard truth is that women’s successes have left them with a small pool of similarly educated and financially stable men, they say. “It’s created an imbalance that tips relationship power in the direction of the men. Instead of men competing for women, today women feel like they must compete for men.

10. Being Decisive

Wilson’s above post, naturally caused reactions and in this follow up post continuing the single women v single men debate: who should take the driver’s seat? she explains the Eligible-Bachelor Paradox:

Where have all the good men gone? Wait for it, this is the BIG BIG point:

Married young, most of them—and sometimes to women whose most salient characteristic was not their beauty, or passion, or intellect, but their decisiveness.

What have you been reading that has made you think?

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Comments

  1. says

    As always, a fantastic wrap-up, Nic. I’m off for some serious reading… but can I just say one thing about the ‘work-life juggle’ that we read so much about… I’m really over it. Really. It’s not ‘work-life’ and we shouldn’t have to ‘juggle’. If we find ourselves constantly juggling and stressed out, well, enough talk. It’s time for action – make. some. changes. Whatever you have to do, however you have to do it. Get off the ‘success’ rollercoaster and really start living.

    It just isn’t good enough for our society to talk so much about how to manage ‘the juggle’. We need to examine where our priorities are and then organise our lives to put them at the top. Then, it’s no longer a juggle, it’s just ‘things we do to get to our top priorities’… or something like that.

    Sorry for the essay! x

  2. says

    I agree with Maxabella!

    I wrote a few posts last year about ‘juggling’. I don’t like it. Life isn’t about juggling, it’s about living and living well. The older I get, the more conscious I am about not taking on too much. About mindfully choosing a few things to put my energy into and then doing those things well.

    I am still exactly who I am regardless of what I’m doing and I don’t need to look to outside jobs, labels and responsibilities to define myself.

    It’s really interesting to keep having these discussions and challenging people to think about their lives and priorities, so great list Nic, well done. I look forward to reading a few more of these posts in more detail.

  3. says

    Thanks so much for linking to my post! I had to come and visit you! What an awesome blog, and the title planning with kids caught my attention. I raised 4, and now my oldest daughter is raising 6! I’ll have to point her your way as well!
    Reading Belinda and Maxabella’s comments, I have to agree. It used to be that we women were adament we wanted *it all* and we could do it, by golly! And now we are realizing it is not worth the sacrifices to our family and to our own health.
    My blog is all about living a balanced life, I’d love for you to come and visit, and Nicole, I’d be glad to do a guest post, if this is a topic you think your readers would like to hear more about!
    Bernice

  4. Gin says

    Reading the Sarah Wilson posts made me think about the last time I went out on the town (with my mum friends – we were all wearing knee length skirts and kitten heels) I noticed nearly all the girls were wearing super high heels and super short skirts, with hair and make-up to the nines. By comparison the blokes were wearing jeans and T-shirts. Whatever happened to the peacock strutting his stuff to impress the choosy peahen? It definitely felt like the women were competing while the men had their pick. Maybe we girls do need to dress down a bit, stop competing and reclaim some power.

  5. says

    i made this a fave to bookmark it in google reader and finally got round to checking out the links.
    i’m so glad i saved it – thank you for sharing some great insights in these posts

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