Back in February I reorganised Possum’s drawers and wardrobes. Possum has independently dressed herself since she was two and has an eclectic sense of style! For an example of this, see the photo in the Wordless Wednesday post preceding this.
The style I have learnt to cope with, but as the mornings have started to get colder (4 - 7 degrees Celsius) Possum and I have started to have battles over what is warm enough to wear for the walk to school.
Shorts and leggings are her favourite items of clothing and there was a few of these pieces of clothing left in her drawers. As her favourites they were also in high rotation. Some days we would have a discussion about how cold it was outside and we would find some middle ground by putting her leggings on underneath the shorts.
Two mornings last week though the discussion was really a battle and their was unhappiness on both sides. I now knew this situation was causing too much disruption to our morning routine and I needed to make some changes.
On the weekend I sat Possum down and explained that we are almost near winter and all shorts now need to be put away until spring when the weather warms up. Possum was devastated and cried about how much shes loves her shorts, but they went away.
Mr Infrastructure had suggested that I just put them away without telling her. I really try to be honest with the kids and expect them to be so with me, so although it was very difficult to see Possum so upset, I think it has worked out for the best.
Since we moved them out of her drawers on the weekend, Possum has not asked for the shorts and has started dressing more appropriately for the weather and the school morning routine is much more peaceful.
Removing the source of the battle, as opposed to trying to manage the battle on a daily basis is something that I have done before and have found it an effective strategy for managing contentious issues in the house. I just wish that I had remembered to do this a month ago!
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yes , out of sight out of mind works in some ways but it is also good to follow up with explanations.
Glad the battles have ceased.
Trishs last blog post..A New BEST day ever -update
By Trish on 05.29.08 4:46 pm | Permalink
I’d be upfront with my girls, too. Nobody likes to feel like they’ve been ‘tricked’ - even children.
We have the opposite problem at the moment - Miss 3 has decided she is simply too fashionable and is refusing to wear the same thing twice.
This post has inspired me to make some changes so that we don’t keep having this battle every morning!
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By Alison on 05.29.08 7:44 pm | Permalink
Good thinking 99!
Removing the source of a battle is often the wiser option that trying to draw new lines.
Bettinas last blog post..Afternoon of Happy.
By Bettina on 05.29.08 8:18 pm | Permalink
I had a free spirited child as well who liked to dress herself from an early age.
I made it a rule of drawers…
she could only go to the top drawers when it was hot and the cold drawers are were for Winter or cold weather.It worked quite well for a while until she started challenging that. When she came out in the middle of Summer with a thick stripey jumper on for preschool, I let her wear it. She kept it on all day the teacher said but she must have learnt a lesson because she went back to her Summer drawers for the rest of the season! These days everything is jumbled up on the floor - there is no drawer system! LOL
tiffs last blog post..Where I talk about febrile convulsions…again.
By tiff on 05.30.08 2:57 pm | Permalink
[...] discussion about the appropriateness of the outfit calmly when we are not under time pressures (see Removing The Battle Lines for further [...]
By 10 Tips For Organised School Mornings | Planning With Kids on 07.15.08 10:02 pm | Permalink
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